The Art of Sacred Communication.

Practicing the art of sacred listening
Listening
When you are talking to someone, be with them fully, focused on what is being said, not with what’s going on in your head.
This is called listening. Listening is not passive. It is an active part of dialogue and it works both ways.

Ask yourself – am I listening from my heart? When you are listening from your heart there is no tendency to interrupt or push or to make your opinion heard. You are just listening. The whole of your body is listening. Your soul is listening.

Blocks to Listening

Comparing.
Comparing your self to the person speaking. You are smarter/more competent and therefore you are a better person. Or they are better – proving your unworthiness.

Mind Reading
Figuring out what the other person is really thinking/feeling. Often this involves making assumptions about how others are reacting to you.

Rehearsing
Thinking about what you are going to say next.

Filtering
Listening to some things and not to others. Hearing only what you want to hear.
Half – listening, while thinking of something else.

Judging
Applying labels to another person – often negative labels.

Dreaming
Being triggered into your own memories by something the other person says.

Identifying
Referring everything to your own experience. Talking about a similar experience of your own instead of responding to the other person’s experience.

Advising
If you come up with advice and suggestions as soon as someone stops speaking, you have been problem solving instead of listening.

Think about these the next time you are listening.

Are you guilty of one of the above?

Being 'Human', it is very differcult not to.

Talking Sticks

Today I had Quality Time with my 12 year old daughter. We didn’t do anything special; it was a day where we lived along side one another, doing our own activities.
We shared eating times together. We went to the supermarket.

It was a great day.

Being with her today reminded me of the time when we made “talking sticks.”

The talking stick was used by the North American Indian tribes. It was honoured and respected and passed around at council meetings. Whoever was holding the talking stick had the right to be heard uninterrupted. Nowadays the concept is used in groups so as to avoid discussions degenerating into mayhems.

This idea can be used in your home.

In busy household’s children can feel that they are not listened to.
If a child has something that they would like to share with you, sitting with the talking stick gives them the knowledge that they have your undivided attention.

MAKE YOUR OWN STICK
It is fun to make your own stick; so why not go for a walk with your child. Explore along a beach or forest. Let your child find their stick, explain that is has to be functional, and able to be comfortably held in their hand.
Decorate your stick; get out your craft box, find ribbons, wool, feathers, beads, paints, felt pens, etc;
Now ask your child to choose materials or do drawings on the stick that represent aspects of their life.
Suggestions: Their favourite animal, what they like doing; dancing, singing. Think about symbolizing virtues, such as love, kindness, honesty, sharing, co-operation, patience.

The idea is to make their stick personal. something they can relate to.

I hope you enjoy.